The Wild Man
Jarod,
- OK so none of us wants to be castrated (whatever that means), by society, by a woman, or by the Church. There is something very attractive about maintaining the Wildman inside of the male, of keeping him around. The Wildman side is unpredictable, you never know what sort of reaction you will receive from him. There is a fresh honesty when a man acts out of his present state of emotion. The other day I was in a "flip off the world" type mood. Of course, I would never express that outwardly, but inside of my mind I was driving crazily down the bypass, cutting off slow drivers and raising heck. I wanted that side of me to come out. I've wanted the Wild Man in me to jump out and attack people when I sense they are being trite or stupid. I've imagined myself in many different situations where the more Wild Dave takes over and acts in a more "natural instinct". How do I harness that Wild Man energy and channel it for good purposes? Is this even possible? It could be that this energy only exists in the reserves of the evil Wild Man, and I either must use it the way it is or dispose of it properly. What does it mean that we are wild anyway? The man at Auto Zone represents a man who must wear a mask of pleasantness because the company told him to. In the end, he has decided to submit to the rules of the company. He does what he is told because he wants (needs?) to fit the system. Suppose he decided not to try to fit the system. Where would one draw the line? I don't think I would mind walking into an Auto Zone and having the guy greet me with a mumbled, "What the hell do you want?" But the Wildman is more than just a bad attitude. The real question is, how does a man follow the teachings of Christ, and still retain his wild side? I think the answer has to do with what you were saying about going against the system. Again, it is a search for identity. It is a desire not to bow to undeserved authority. The wildman usually considers himself to be the highest authority in his life, therefore HE is the decision-maker. He "breaks the rules" because they are not his rules in the first place. But again all of this sounds very negative...what does it look like to be fierce, yet meek? There is another deeper question that I am wrestling with, and it is this... I have seen the value in focusing on honesty of emotions. But when I express those angry feelings, it sometimes causes me to become even more angry. Is this me tapping into a deeper pool of previously untouched emotion, or is it snowballing within me as a result of relishing in my initial feeling? There is much more to discuss about the Wildman... -Dave
